I am selling my neighbor's dog.
It's big, furry, brown, and has four legs. As for breed type...it's a cross between the Hound of the Baskervilles and Cerberus.
Ideally the new owner will live out-of-town in a telephone-pole free area with little chance of seeing one of those pesky 'Lost Dog' signs.
Cash only or trade for a case of Dr. Pepper.