30 March 2010

Word Pictures

A picture is not (usually) worth a thousand words unless it is an illiterate society. The closer a society approaches illiteracy-the more dumbed down it gets-the more images gain an influence. So when image is everything, the bad people know it is time to make their move.

Taking over a barbaric society is much easier than controlling a learned society because the barbarians do not know how to communicate clearly. All people know intuitively the difference between right and wrong, but if nobody can articulate exactly why certain things should be done then the moochers and the pirates can have a field day.

This is how many of history's dictators and warlords came to power.

An inarticulate society can be tricked into submission using nothing but pictures, sound bites, and slogans.

Sometimes all it takes is food, and if the society is obese and addicted...fat, dumb,and happy...so much the better.

20 March 2010

March Madness

I saw this on World Magazine's web site.

17 March 2010

The Official United States Census 2010: An Odyssey

By now, all you beloved readers have received the official US census form in the mail. If not, we can safely assume you are not an American...or worse...an un-person. The census begins by stating 'it must count every person living in the United States on April 1, 2010.' There are an estimated 6.8 billion persons living today and to expect a single census to count them all from the US has got to be an April Fool's Day joke.

The census also states to 'count all people, including babies, who live and sleep here most of the time.' It's scary to think that some people would not consider a baby to be a person and need to be told to count the little people.

We are also asked to name our race. As a biologist and a person I consider the word race to have very little inherent meaning. I think the only race is the human race and we are all descendants from Adam and Eve. Seeing as how Adam and Eve were from modern-day Southern Iraq, I assume this means all of us American persons are Iraqis engaged in a great civil war, counting everybody, from every nation so conceived and so dedicated for as long as we can endure.

10 March 2010

The Clam Boycott.

Early this morning my gastro-esophageal sphincter muscle friends abandoned me. Since then, I have been talking to Jesus and apologizing for the false offerings of clam chowder to the Gizzard God. Neptune, you should know, is responsible for this. He is to blame. The Great White Throne judgement I'm told will not be something you want to see. I know this from more than anecdotal experience and shall now enter into a lifelong boycott of clams, oysters, mussels, and other barnacle-like entities.

06 March 2010


Twas' the day before Sunday,
and all through the casa.
There was nothing to eat,
except Taco Bell salsa.

The cabinets were bare,
Except for the air.
Waiting for food,
That soon would be there.

I think it's time to explore the nearest grocery store.

04 March 2010


While sauntering through the grocery store today an old man sporting a long grey shaggy beard, ripped and faded blue jeans, flannel shirt, and muddy moccasins approached me and said,

"It's all a conspiracy, you know. It really is. Just a big conspiracy."

And because I felt quite ornery I said, "You're right. It IS a big conspiracy. It...it's mind boggling."

The old geezer nodded.

I nodded.

Then the lady behind me took her loaf of bread, donuts, and bag of apples to another cashier.

03 March 2010

OK GO Music Video

This is the coolest music video I've ever seen.