04 April 2008

Relations, Kin, and such like

I've been working on a family tree, and thought, perhaps, I would share some family photos with the blogging community.

Bobby “Bones” Jones: Bones is my older brother currently working as a part-time night janitor at Alabama University. He is a man of few words and a master of monosyllabic replies.

Some uncles: Beef and Goose. . .(Nobody remembers their real 1st names)
Beef and Goose worked for the FBI in surveillance from 67' to 83.' Last I heard from them, they was consultants to Verizon and now live at 67 Newberry St, Ct, 34687 under the federal witness protection program under the aliases Theodore Eisenstein and Nigel Thornsworth.

Horseshoe pitching with Charley Joe and J.B. “Moose” Lee

Weedeater: The family goat

Billy E. Lee: Big Bill is another cousin who owns a string of restaurants. He studied fashion design in college, but dropped out because his major professor felt that man-bra's (bros) were too risque

Scooter and Jim Bob: These here are my two twin cousins from Chatanooga. There was a 3rd twin, but he got himself adopted by a nice mormon couple out Utah ways as a young un’ and we haven’t heard from him since. Scoot and Jim Bob work on cars and remodeling old houses. They’re seriously considering starting up some kind of fix-it show with Willie ‘Bulldog’ Frank to make ends meet.

Uncle Buck: Uncle Buck is no longer with us. As a matter of fact, he wasn’t really with us for the last 25 years of his life as he was fond of something called grand theft larceny. I'm not saying he was slow, but if the Devil got sick, he's the one you'd send for the doctor.

Self Portrait: This here is me as the caption indicates. I don’t usually post pics online of myself (not being photogenetical and all), but this was one of my better hair days.

Clara Lee Sarah Bell and Nellie Rose Allie May: On a hot summer day.

Willie ‘Bulldog’ Frank: Willie made it to the big time. He currently lives in Nashville and hangs with all the big dog country singers. His claim to fame is the writer to the song 'If you wanna keep the beer cold, put it next to my ex-wife's heart.'

Hoss Jones: Hoss is a professional barn painter by trade and a world-renowned expert in imported and exported beers.

Grandpappy: Him’s the one who started it all.

“Scrap Iron,” Benji, and Ida May Nellie Rose-Iron: On their wedding day: Scrap Iron and Ida got married after 8 long years of dating and courting. Benji is still looking for a mate. Him’s the dog, btw.

Iron's wedding cake.


Dave said...

J.B. “Moose” Lee kinda looks like Mike Lester.
Are you sure they aren't one in the same?

Jason said...

That might just be near to the truth. All moose look alike to non-mooses. . .so they tell me.